Posts Tagged ‘women’

Funk

Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

I feel like I am in a funk today… that usually means my period is right around the corner.  But I guess this could be a come down from last week.  I mean WOW, what a week!

Not only did Jeremy jump back in (and right back out again in a hurry), I also started training the baby fan boy (I am going to make some other woman very happy some day), I somehow fit a date in to my week as well, we also had the wedding, rehearsal dinner, girl night, indoctrination in to a family, joy, envy, LAUGHTER, the after party, making out with straight girls, a ton of drinking, short visits and a few sleep overs with Nick and some texts that never should have been sent. (and not all in that order!)

I heard things  and did things that made me feel totally irresponsible this last week… I also heard things and did things that made me feel like I was on top of the world!  Now I am going to take a bath and possibly do more yard work.  I will figure myself out one of these days… or maybe I should just let the dark cloud of PMS run it’s  course and decide that is all this is.

I feel like an idiot all over again when I say things like “I still wish I could love you enough for the both of us.”  OY!  I really need to get over myself.

My Weekend

Monday, May 31st, 2010

Weekend at the lake:: In Quote and Monologue

All by myself:

I read a line in a book today… “It was as satisfying as the sex.”   This sums up what my ideal partner will make me feel outside of the “bedroom”.

Is it even possible (or fair) to seek that from one person?  I have never had a hard time finding satisfying sex, but I have never found sex from the same people who can satisfy me outside the bedroom.

But then again that is why relationships are open right?  So everyone is settled all around.

Then the fun begins: Quotes from the group…

“That’s IT!  I am going to pull the duplex kidney card”

“I want mood rings, especially if I marry a woman… Then I will know when she is going to be a bitch”

“Wait… Do you even have the right equipment for me to get on me knees?” ~ a Blank Stare followed this comment.

“I could charge you… but I don’t have to.”

“This is totally hot… You, in the sauna, NAKED, knitting.”

“I appreciate that the walls are not sound proof”

“We were just watching the show, not judging.”

“Do you need me to pretend I have a dick?”

“I like the sound of rope”

“I’m the compact version”

“Do that with a CAT-5 networking cable!”

“It occurred to me that it felt a little small”

“It’s like orange things combined to create orange super power”

“This morning for breakfast we will have Michelle, sunny side up and over easy.”

“After breakfast Bondage… I like it!”

“I don’t think I have had enough champagne or caffeine to deal with this!”

“He is hot, but I am just more interested in myself.”

“I covet her skirt, her camera and her!”

“I love when other people reproduce and it comes out good.”

“If you think you have key lime custard on your shirt you should take it off and check.”

“Pete, we need to build a robot!”

“I can’t think of tractors without iced tea.”

“Sockdreams… that website makes me wet like porn makes other people wet.”

“Shannon, do you want to feel my socks?”

“I just figured out you can masturbate as a chick too.”

“I didn’t realize it would be that big when I pulled it out.”

“It only looked guilty because I had 2 at once.”

“I am not slutty… I am slutacious.”

“Slutacious sounds yummy.”

“There’s a dirty road from Scrabble to rice?”

“If you can’t find it, it’s ok.”

“Whoralicious”

“My engagement ring is trying to lick me.”

“It also helps me fall asleep to touch foreign objects in my arm.”

“I don’t like getting uterus under my nails!”

Thank you ALL so much for making this a wonderful weekend.  As I sit here typing this up I am looking out at the rain over the lake wishing I didn’t have to leave here today.  Who is joining in the FUN next weekend?  I have one more weekend at the Blue House then I may be out at the Red house for the last couple of weeks in June.  I don’t really have anything holding me in town once Rashell is out of school… well until I start school anyway.   LOVE ME SOME LAKE TIME!!

Here it is in fast forward:  Arrive, Read, arrivals, wine, food, wine, flirting, ditch the kid, pick up hotness and more food, return, flirting, more arrivals, food, wine, naked time, breasts, room sharing, sleep, food, kid in the lake, departure number one, kid gets returned, wine, kid sleeps at neighbors, more sexual innuendos, mass amounts of frivolity, knitting, wine, all on one couch, wine, food, naked time… or not, I got carried to bed, awaken, coffee, leaving, cleaning, final inspection and now I am home!

Who wants to do it all again next weekend??

Sleepless in Spokane

Monday, May 17th, 2010

I don’t sleep anymore.  Not like I should …

HOLD please it is dark and raining … and warm.  I am going to go be naked for a bit in my yard …

ok,  I am back.  It is a little chilly outside once you get all wet.  Why don’t I ever have the right partner at the right time to go have sex with me outside on the rain?  Anyway… where was I … Oh ya, sleep.  Well I have not been sleeping well.  There is so much change that happened in a short time.  I mean my entire definition of my life has been altered.  And in all honesty, I MISS Jeremy!  I miss the night we laid in bed and watched the lightening of a storm from my window, I miss running over to see him (see?) on my lunch breaks, I miss his arms around me and how safe and comforted and protected I felt in them… I could go on, but there isn’t any point.  I am sure I could come up with the things that I do not miss, but I do not see the point in that.

Hold please… must watch storm!

Oh and the sex… I really miss the sex.  OY!  I was done with that part wasn’t I?

I know… I need a personal ad.  Send it to all your friends:

Single White Female seeks Single Male or Female as a life companion and lover.  I am looking for someone to laugh with me and who is unafraid to dance in the rain… or who is at least willing to stand by and laugh while I dance in the rain.  Must live a healthy lifestyle, love cats and kids.  Be ready for grand adventures that include pulling weeds, dancing till 4am, frantically searching the yard for the lost tortoise again, reading on the front steps with your morning coffee and gathering in groups full of laughter and love.  I love to read books that I have read before because it feels like I am visiting an old friend I have not seen in a while, and I read new books to meet new friends.  Must be full of acceptance and posses the ability not to let me make all the rules in the lightest way possible.  I am looking for someone to walk with me on the path of life as my equal.  Are you out there?

Social Butterfly

Sunday, May 2nd, 2010

Did you know that I get really REALLY nervous when I go out?  If I drive myself I get all quakey  and shivery inside.  I worry that the night is not going to go well or that I am going to make myself look stupid and be ashamed in the morning.  Once I get to a place I am able to step in to character and go with the flow.  I am able to leave my worry at the door, or at least bury it under the persona I put on.  I did one hell of an amazing job of putting on the Shannon when I went out the other night!  I had a blast, got to kiss a beautiful girl, got to flirt with the help and actually push the straight men who tried to touch me.

I am so nervous when it comes to flirting with women.  It matters to me if they say yes or no.  That is why men are so easy.  I find one that looks like fun and think “Hrm, that would be fun and easy” and go hit on them.  And right now I am so nervous about this school thing that I am looking for a … distraction.

I carry around a lot of self doubt and question myself at every turn.  I am never sure that I can actually DO anything until it is done.  I am also never sure I am worth it to the people I am dating.  I am sure that has lead to a lot of selling myself short in the past, but now I have seen what life and relationships can feel like if I DON’T sell myself short.  From here on out I act as if I AM worth it! (OK OK OK, so I have always been good at ACTING like I am worth it, I will start feeling like I am worth it!)